Dorothy

We all have intuition within us whether we realize it or not. It’s that feeling you get when something isn’t right or doesn’t sit well although we are unsure just why. It’s that little “irritation” that is telling you that something in your world isn’t as it seems, that your world is a little more tilted than usual.

You may receive your intuition as a gut feeling, a tingling or a knowing yet you can’t put your finger on what isn’t right no matter how much you look for the answer...you just have to trust that in time the answers will come.

Two weeks ago my lovely friend Kim contacted me to say that someone she knew was focusing on an outdoor concert with a couple of bands to bring the community together, within Covid rules. The event was to take place on a Friday night in the woman’s back yard, surrounded by nature’s beauty and accompanied by the song birds. My eager friend told me that tickets were selling fast and if I was going to attend, that I should purchase one soon.

Although I know of the woman who was doing the gathering, I didn’t know her personally but she, like most of us, is a healer who has the highest of intentions for everyone she meets. I thought it would be fun to attend, not only because several of my friends would be going, but because this would be a new experience for me.

I’m not one to attend such an event because of my sensitivities to energies, but this time I chose to step out of my “normal” and do something different. I’m not a fan of large crowds but another beautiful friend of mine, Elena, mentioned that if the party became too much for us both, that we could take a walk on the beach where the host lived. With that in my back pocket, I bought a ticket.

As the date approached I became uncertain, not because this was out of my norm, but because I began to feel that something wasn’t right which I couldn’t put my finger on. I had expressed to Kim this uncertainty and she encouraged me to come to the party. Back and forth I hummed and hawed about going/not going to the event and each time something didn’t feel right about it.

The Wednesday night before the party I dreamt I had a poltergeist in my home. Being a medium I’ve often had terrible nightmares to accompany my gifts, nightmares that are equivalent to Steven King’s horror novels. In my dream the poltergeist was very persistent in making its presence known by opening and closing doors and throwing objects about like a child having a tantrum. On any given waking day, poltergeists captivate me because of how they can easily manipulate energy to move or levitate a physical object. The amount of power it takes to do that is simply extraordinary!

Thursday night before the party I dreamt I broke my left leg. I distinctly remember seeing the cast on my leg and thinking (in my dream) that I was grateful that it was my left leg that broke because being an independent person, I could still drive myself around. (Even in my dreams I have an attitude of gratitude). I remember seeing myself at the party, with a drink in hand and a cast of my left foot, walking around on the grass.

When Friday came I told myself that I was going to go to the party and that was the end of it. My week had been full of client bookings and I thought it would be a great way to end the week and to start my weekend. I began to type a message to Kim to let her know but erased it mid sentence because I started having those “impending doom” feelings.

Friday was a busy day for me as I was fully booked with readings. I had planned it so that I would be done by a specific time which gave me plenty of grace to get ready for the party and to drive there to be on time. By the end of my last client I had developed a headache that was slowly making itself known. I sat at my desk and asked my Spirit Guides if I should “stay or go”. This is something I do when I am uncertain what my next step is.

I have used this technique for a few years now. When at a crossroads I ask my Spirit Guides if I should “stay” home or should I “go” out. They always respond, but I don’t always listen.

I remember a couple of years ago when I had done some online dating. On two occasions my suitor and I decided to meet in person, before I left the house I asked my Spirit Guides if I should “stay or go” knowing that they always answer. Both times they said I should stay home, but I decided that they were wrong and decided to go out anyways.

One guy I met at a local coffee shop and he showed up in sweat pants and a wife beater shirt on top of a cut off sweatshirt. I politely drank my tea while he told me how steel was made, as he picked the dirt out of his fingernails. When he had drank his coffee he told me he had to use the facilities and “if I was still there when he came out” we’d go for dinner. Needless to say I left. Driving home I said to my Guides, “I know, I know, you’re right, I should have stayed home. Please accept my apologies.”

When I met the second guy through online dating we agreed to meet at a different coffee shop. Before I left again asked if I should “stay or go”. Guess what the answer was? It was “stay” and again I chose to go. Date number two was worse than date number one. This guy wanted a submissive woman in every sense of the word. He was pleasant at first and then wanted to control every aspect of my life. He would say to me “I am big” and he wanted me to say “I am small” because he saw it as a way to “protect me”. When I didn’t respond with what he wanted, he would repeat “I am big”. I’d just respond “I am bigger”. When I told him I was going to use the facilities, he said he hadn’t given me permission. I told him I didn’t need his permission.

I unleashed on him and said that anyone, especially women, don't like to be made to “feel small”. I told him that he would be better off encouraging and nurturing a woman to be the best person that she can be, rather than fearing them. He wanted to be the alpha and I was the voiceless pretty doll he wanted to control.

When I left the “whatever-that-was”, driving home I again profusely apologized to my Spirit Guides. They gave me the “stay” message and I didn’t listen.

With Friday night approaching and needing to make a decision quickly, I asked my Spirit Guides if I should “stay” home or “go” out to the event. I received “stay” home and so I informed my friends and stayed home.

As the world is slowly emerging from our shells and people are waking up to this new world that Covid is showing us, every Friday night several of my neighbours meet in the parking lot for a tailgate party of sorts. It’s been a way to meet the neighbours and to converse with friends with a laugh or two.

At 4 pm, depending on the weather, the regulars come out of their homes with a lawn chair in hand, a bevvie or two and settle in for a few hours of stories, gossip and general conversations about life. There is talk of grandchildren, surgeries, the weather, deaths, and everything in between.

I hadn’t been to the covid tailgate party for a few weeks and so I decided it was time to see everyone again. Everyone greeted me with a cheer and a smile and I joined in with the conversations. As I was sitting with one of the ladies with whom I have never chatted with, I thought to myself that I was grateful that I hadn’t gone to see the live bands, that this was where I had preferred to be anyways.

I was talking to one of my neighbours about her husband. You see I saw him washing his car by hand a few months ago. He had a bucket in one hand and what looked like a wash mitt on his other hand. I distinctly remember seeing a green mitt on his hand that was soapy. He looked at me and I looked at him as I drove by. I jokingly thought about asking him if he wanted to wash my vehicle after his but I continued on my way. Through previous tailgate parties I had mentioned this to the regulars and they had said that her husband had died months previous to my seeing him. It was this time around that I had mentioned it to the woman whose husband I had seen and so we were laughing and having a good conversation about him.

One of my favourite ladies was at the tailgate party. She is a wee Scottish lady named Dorothy or “Dot” to some, with tattoos and a heart of gold. One of her tattoos was a Scottish flag in a heart, which sat perfectly on her left ankle. Her accent is so strong that when she says my name it sounds like “Jen”. She always has a smile on her face, a wave in her hand and a funny sarcastic comment waiting for the right moment. She is one of life’s lovely people; the purest of souls.

One day I was out shopping and I saw her in the parking lot near my chiropractor's office. I asked her what she was doing and she said she had an appointment at the chiropractor...the same one. I had my adjustment and waited for her to be done as I offered to drive her back home. She is a tiny lady in stature and I asked if she needed help climbing into my high vehicle...she said her son had a truck and I needn’t worry. Easily she clambered into my vehicle, patiently waiting for me to follow suit. From there I drove her to another store and finally to the strata where we lived.

At the tailgate party Dorothy engaged us in conversation and was very jovial. She brought me some water from her home as we sat in the hot sun, enjoying each other's company. Some of the regulars recently saw me on the T+E show Hotel Paranormal and were asking me about it, Dorothy being one of them. Everyone was in high spirits recounting the past week and looking forward to things to come. Dorothy was trying a new drink; Cider. I asked her how she liked it and in her Scottish tongue she replied “I don’t” and then gave us one of her famous laughs as her face lit up with happiness.

As the early evening approached, neighbours eventually left to continue on with their lives, including Dorothy.

Yesterday (Sunday) I had an appointment to visit a friend at her work. She was giving me a tour of the spa which she manages. As I was leaving home I saw two police cruisers in the complex where I live and noted each of them. Several hours later when I returned home the cruisers were still there and I inquired to a neighbour about why they were here….

It was then that I learned that my dear lovely 77 year young Scottish friend and neighbour, Dorothy, had died suddenly.

On Friday night she was happy, independent, full of life, strong, funny, sarcastic, witty and beautiful and on Sunday morning she was gone.

I will miss Dorothy so much. She was a light in this world that could never be tamed and I will take that page from her book and place it in my own. She treated everyone with love and kindness and never said a bad word about anyone. She will be missed by everyone in the complex who loved and cherished her. Rest with ease my dear friend.

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I now understand why I felt uncertain about going to the event with the bands and why my Spirit Guides had told me to “stay” home. If I had gone, I would never have seen Dorothy again and I would have kicked myself for not spending more time with her.

I was able to enjoy one more tailgate party with Dorothy...and that is worth its weight in Gold.